The Herman and Sven monologues.

[Col]

Rules,

1, All posts to be in a mock German accent. (and read in the same mock German accent).

2, Don't mention ze vaw.

3, Ve haf to preetend ve are Germuns who vork forr either Audi or VW.

4, Ze crazier and madder ze better.

5, Timeshiftts and alternate realitities are goot, yah?

6, Use of ze vord 'schnell' iss goot as vell.


(You either get this or you won't, but I don't care).

[Col]

Ingolstat 2008.....

Sven, "Not goot, ze Britisher BMW drivers are now in ze driving Audis."

Herman, "Yah, yah, yah, nine, not goot, everyone vill fink they are wonkers and bring zee brand name down."

Sven, "Yah, yah yah."

[Dudey Head]

Herman: "Ah vell, ve can still rip zem off viz de stupid prices zose nobben-hedens are paying for ze cars. Who cares if de arsenholens are jumping from ze BMW's?

Sven: "It vud haf been nice if dey had jumped from ze moving BMW's!"

Herman: "Ja, sehr gut!"

[k9max]

Sven: Or maybe ve could sabotage the Audis zey buy vith an ejection (yah, you read zis right....hey Herman, I cracked a vunderbar German joke,nine?) seat, und it vill be deployed ven dey are driving over a bridge, ze schwinehunds.

Herman: yah, yah, dat is ein gut idea, becoz it vould seem our attempts to get ze Britisher government to hike ze tax prices up have not done ze trick!
Ve could also alvays make it compulsory for zem to wear ein pair of lederhosen vith every new Audi zey buy, if dat doesn't vork, nothing vill, und zey vill change zeir minds schnell, nine????