Ebay Idiots!

[bora(ing) nick]

link (http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/PowerMAXX-35bhp-Vortex-Generator-for-VOLKSWAGEN_W0QQitemZ190326156044QQcmdZViewItemQQpt ZUK_CarsParts_Vehicles_CarParts_SM?hash=item2c5052 ab0c&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14#ebayphotohosting)

one of the lads from work has just emailed me with the link above, asking if i'd get one for his golf on my Ebay account.

I swiftly told him to do one, and stop being such a mug. How can a pressed piece of metal inserted into (and restricting) the air intake add 35 BHP ??

Anyway, what other absolutely bonkers items have you lot seen (or bought) on ebay.

Nick

[omegadirective]

Thats crazy...lol. So many of these scams out there.

[Eshrules]

circumvention of ebay fees through the use of massive postage?

that's a reportable breach that is... wonder if anybody has reported him for it

<whistles>

[Hex69]

this is the classic one

LINK (http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/DIESEL-CHIP-TUNING-BOX-MODULE-VW-AUDI-SEAT-SKODA_W0QQitemZ280377882009QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_C arsParts_Vehicles_CarParts_SM?hash=item4147d2f599&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14)

[hagis]

Yellow text on a white background, what a 'tard.

[Dudey Head]

Yellow text on a white background, what a 'tard.

Yeah, unreadable isn't it?! Just as well it's a load of crap & not worth reading anyway!! :D

[bora(ing) nick]

Yellow text on a white background, what a 'tard.

I highlighted the text by scrolling over it.... it then turns a much more paletable blue colour :) lol

[macmillions]

Didn't someone manage to sell an Air Guitar on ebay...?

[hagis]

Oh bloody hell, when was that? I've been after one for ages.

[Crasher]

The vortex generator idea has done the rounds before, proved useless and died. The answer I have for all these brilliant ideas is a simple one. The worlds car manufacturer backs are against the wall trying to get the most power for the least fuel consumption, if any of these ideas worked, the manufacturers would be on it like flies on ****!

[kodkod.84]

I loved the XBOX 360 Box for sale- was bought for around £200 and yep all they got was an empty box :D

No comebacks as it was stated clearly in the listing it was just the box they were bidding on.

[Dudey Head]

The vortex generator idea has done the rounds before, proved useless and died. The answer I have for all these brilliant ideas is a simple one. The worlds car manufacturer backs are against the wall trying to get the most power for the least fuel consumption, if any of these ideas worked, the manufacturers would be on it like flies on ****!

Crasher, what do you reckon to the Ecotek valve thingy? http://www.ecotekplc.com/CB-26P.htm

Is that a load of crap too I read something about them a while ago and they're supposed to create some sort of fuel/air mix vortex or something like that, which ios what made me think of it now. Hard to see how it can do what it claims & why hasn't the idea been installed as standard like you say!?

Anyone actually encountered one of these in use?

[Dudey Head]

Always read the small print!! ;)

[Crasher]

The Ecoteck is very much like the Hyconomizer was in the 70’s and 80’s. It is just a regulated and filtered air leak through a reed valve that puts a vibration into the air that is intended to break down the fuel droplets. On a carburettor car they can be of some use to help prevent fuel pooling but on a fuel injection car they are not much use. On a car with lambda control, they are a complete waste of time, the pulsations may have a tiny almost immeasurable effect but any leaning of the mixture (the way the fuel consumption is reduced) is instantly dialled out by the lambda sensors input to the ECU. Also, they make a horrid noise akin to a gearbox about to drop its internals on the floor. To be honest, drilling a 0.5-mm hole in the servo pipe would have much the same effect.

[e6m6a6]

Na the one i like is the fuel saver thing

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/NEW-REAL-FUEL-SAVER-MISER-FOR-PETROL-DIESEL-LPG-GAS_W0QQitemZ350237423723QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Car sParts_Vehicles_CarParts_SM?hash=item518bc6f86b&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14

Dont be daft!!

Fuel has no magnectic properties and i actualy asked one bloke how it can save upto 30% like some of them claim

If i drive carfuly i can cut my fuel bills but 30-40% so with this fuel saver surly i should an overal saving of 60-70%??

bullpoo!

[Crasher]

Again, if it worked at all, even giving a 1% improvement, they would be fitted to all cars from new.

[e6m6a6]

A friend nearly got sucked into buying one of the plug in ecu thingys

I think it sat onto of the air box and somehow talked to the ecu telling it that the air is colder then is actualy is

I simply emailed the guy and asked a few questions and all of suddern he did not seem so confident

Do these people think we are all idiots, i do know you get some right airheads out there, i.e my friend!

[ali_a4_avant]

"Just directly attach them to the fuel lines, one pair is fine but we do advise to fit as many as 2 pairs per car if possible, especially diesels, you can fit as many as you like but we say 6 pairs/sets is certainly enough per car"

"Basically untreated fuel tends to clump together due to the attraction of molecules, so when the cylinder burns the fuel it is inefficient. This effect will cause your engine to not use the fuel as it could, i.e. decrease in performance, lower mileage and often carbon build up."

What a load of tosh...

[Crasher]

:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::D:D:1zhelp:

[paul b]

Getting away from the daft side temporarily...

What do we think to fuel molecule organisers?

My mate had one on his A3 2.0 TDI and he reckons he got at least a 4mpg increase. He has plans to purchase one for his new Audi when funds allow.

I should also point out, these cost him circa £300, not 99p. :biglaugh:

[Crasher]

Placebo effect.

[paul b]

Placebo effect.
That's sort of what I first thought. Fuel is fuel sort of thing.

BUT...

I read this:

http://www.apdiesels.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=18&Itemid=42

It would appear a lot of time and money has gone into the idea.

[e6m6a6]

Getting away from the daft side temporarily...

What do we think to fuel molecule organisers?

My mate had one on his A3 2.0 TDI and he reckons he got at least a 4mpg increase. He has plans to purchase one for his new Audi when funds allow.

I should also point out, these cost him circa £300, not 99p. :biglaugh:

Right im no good at maths but that extra 4mpg does not seems to be adding up to the 300 pounds price tag!

It would make its money back, in a about 5 years haha

[Ben]

today i rumbled a chap trying to buy my ps2. He nearly had me until they wanted it shipping to ....guess where?

a couple of phone calls to ebay and paypal and all sorted.

[omegadirective]

today i rumbled a chap trying to buy my ps2. He nearly had me until they wanted it shipping to ....guess where?

a couple of phone calls to ebay and paypal and all sorted.

Nigeria?

[Ben]

yep.

initally they bought an item and at close of auction they were no longer listed as ebay user. registeres on ebay.nl

a few emails back and forth and he nearly had me untill today 5 email giving me the hurry up and asking for it to be posted to nigeria.

[Crasher]

The next thing you know you will have won a lottery you have never entered and the son of an African prince killed in a plane crash will want to give you $66 million in exchange for your bank details.

[Ben]

are you trying the jedi mind trick?

[Crasher]

No, just expecting the worst, I am a cup quarter empty type chap-in fact, just make that empty.

[zollaf]

one of my favourites.
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Fake-Turbo-Sound-Whistler-BOV-Stock-Exhaust-All-CARS_W0QQitemZ370241407370QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Ca rsParts_Vehicles_CarParts_SM?hash=item56341b898a&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14

[Crasher]

Anyone who buys one of those should be executed immediately, no trial nothing-just a rope and a short drop!

[onzarob]

No, just expecting the worst, I am a cup quarter empty type chap-in fact, just make that empty.

oh dear, ROFL......nothing like an optimist in the house :biglaugh:

[Dudey Head]

Anyone who buys one of those should be executed immediately, no trial nothing-just a rope and a short drop!

I don't think they'd even deserve a drop! Just noosed & hoisted.
The ultimate in mindless, crass tat!! :approve:

[Crasher]

oh dear, ROFL......nothing like an optimist in the house :biglaugh:

I find being a pessimist easier, that way, in theory, you should never be disappointed, however the depths of some peoples depravity and immoral behaviour never ceases to surprise and disappoint me in equal measure.

[Hex69]

I find being a pessimist easier, that way, in theory, you should never be disappointed, however the depths of some peoples depravity and immoral behaviour never ceases to surprise and disappoint me in equal measure.

http://www.pinksy.co.uk/images/misc/blakey_dawkins.jpg

[Crasher]

:biglaugh: That made me laugh, about time something did! :1zhelp:

[Hex69]

:biglaugh: That made me laugh, about time something did! :1zhelp:

I aim to please.:D

[Dudey Head]

I find being a pessimist easier, that way, in theory, you should never be disappointed, however the depths of some peoples depravity and immoral behaviour never ceases to surprise and disappoint me in equal measure.



:biglaugh: That made me laugh, about time something did! :1zhelp:

http://www.maturetimes.co.uk/files/images/Miserable%20Old%20Git-final.jpg

It can't rain all the time!!

[Crasher]

It can't rain all the time!!

Ohh yeh, have you looked outside at any time this summer or the last three! Barbecue summer my ****! Mind you I hate barbecues. I really upset my wife and neighbours last night. Mowing the lawn in between torrential downpours, my nostrils were assailed by the smell of burnt flesh. I said loudly to the wife, "hello, the customary smell of burnt animal flesh again". The wife said I had zero social graces and I heard the neighbours packing the smoke pit away. Why is it that every time the flaming sun comes out, people have to cook in their gardens? Don't their cookers work? Try letting some fresh air into the house or airing the washing and what do you get, barbecue sauce flavour bed linen! Gits! :zx11:

[Hex69]

Ohh yeh, have you looked outside at any time this summer or the last three! Barbecue summer my ****! Mind you I hate barbecues. I really upset my wife and neighbours last night. Mowing the lawn in between torrential downpours, my nostrils were assailed by the smell of burnt flesh. I said loudly to the wife, "hello, the customary smell of burnt animal flesh again". The wife said I had zero social graces and I heard the neighbours packing the smoke pit away. Why is it that every time the flaming sun comes out, people have to cook in their gardens? Don't their cookers work? Try letting some fresh air into the house or airing the washing and what do you get, barbecue sauce favour bed linen! Gits! :zx11:

Who knows, you may end up like this if your neighbours really love you..

http://uktv.co.uk/images/homepage/43945.jpg

[Dudey Head]

Ohh yeh, have you looked outside at any time this summer or the last three! Barbecue summer my ****! Mind you I hate barbecues. I really upset my wife and neighbours last night. Mowing the lawn in between torrential downpours, my nostrils were assailed by the smell of burnt flesh. I said loudly to the wife, "hello, the customary smell of burnt animal flesh again". The wife said I had zero social graces and I heard the neighbours packing the smoke pit away. Why is it that every time the flaming sun comes out, people have to cook in their gardens? Don't their cookers work? Try letting some fresh air into the house or airing the washing and what do you get, barbecue sauce favour bed linen! Gits! :zx11:

True, I was starting to draw up blueprints for an ark, just in case!
That's quite spooky in that Mrs. Dudey denounced me as being a miserable git sometime last month (last it was sunny!) when I said pretty much the same thing!
Why this automatic reaction to sunlight whereby you have to go through the hassle of lighting charcoal only to then stand over it nervously trying to get the right balance of carbonisation & salmonella while everyone else is having a beer & a laugh! The oven is reliable, predictable, doesn't require burning ones digits to get it going & does the job properly.
I don't even do meat, but it's always me that has watch over the sizzling pieces of carcass.
I'm not grumpy though. I'd just rather be drinking, laughing & have someone cooking for me for a change!! ;)

[Crasher]

:D

[pon]

Other half came back from giving blood tonight asking what West Nile Virus is as its on the questionaire. So I typed it into Goolgle, find out you get it from mossies in North America, its not that nice and also life threatening if you catch it
Same page you get an advert to buy it from Ebay.:confused:

Nile virus (http://www.google.com/aclk?sa=L&ai=CT_z8ZsyJSsGPN5GBjAfG0c33CJ20x3f3wa7hCvTF7Q0QAS Dtit8GKARQg-b-dWC73p2D0ArIAQGpAjZb1aeXfrs-qgQeT9DXbJqBZQmhZvSopDL7pf7tODB2aodCVxgYm662&num=1&sig=AGiWqtyQQPhiRuyNWV_NvbvXz5L1iaPe2A&q=http://rover.ebay.com/rover/1/710-35648-5910-0/2%3Fipn%3Dpsmain%26kwid%3D310204723%26mtid%3D10%26 keyword%3Dnile%2520virus%26crlp%3D2798297137_51%26 MT_ID%3D10%26icep_creative_id%3D2798297137%26agid% 3D917549047%26icep_rid%3D710-35648-5910-0%26icep_rotmtid%3D10)

Nile Virus on eBay for less.
Nile virus. Bid now!
www.ebay.co.uk (http://www.ebay.co.uk)