At long last im getting somewhere

[phil miller]

Some of you may remember from the summer about my hassel with my ex over contact with my son, anyway after appling for legal aid and being turned down things went from bad to worse, the last time i saw my son was the 30 aug, it all stopped after i was told if i didnt hand over £105 i wouldnt see him again:( i stood my ground and true to her word i havent seen him and i get no answer from any calls or texts asking about my son :zx11: but i waited as you have to and reapplied, today thro the post i had the letter i have been praying for, i have been excepted for legal aid which (after a call tomorrow) will mean my solictor can get the ball rolling and hopefully bring an end to my excile from my son, he will be 2 in march so after a 4 month gap it will be hard to start with, there is light at the end of the tunnel hopefully it wont take long to get there

so as you can understand im buzzing :arms::banana::arms:

[stuart]

Good stuff mate, I hope all goes well ;)

[andy e]

saw your original post, glad things are hopefully starting to go in the right direction, hope it works out, and you can kick the bitches butt:

[zollaf]

well done. :beerchug:

[fat controller]

Good news mate :) - For what its worth, I reckon you are a better man that I, for I am not sure I could be as level headed or as patient as you've been in waiting to re-apply to get further help.

Hope its all resolved quickly from here on in.

[phil miller]

Good news mate :) - For what its worth, I reckon you are a better man that I, for I am not sure I could be as level headed or as patient as you've been in waiting to re-apply to get further help.

Hope its all resolved quickly from here on in.

its been hard, i got the letter on june the 19 (dated the 5 :confused:) saying id been turned down, so after talking to my solictor he said i would need to fill out the forms again, in late oct i filled out the paper work at my solictors office and was told he would submit it as soon as he could and i was to not rock the boat and not to go down to her house as that would make things worse, its been a very long wait but im glad we can get the ball rolling, just a shame its a little to late for christmas, im sure even if a letter was sent tomorrow she would drag her feet till the new year, but a new year a new start:) , im hoping my little man can spend time with me without the court having to tell his mum, i know ive said this a few times but i class all of you as my friends on here even tho ive never met you :beerchug:

[Bratty]

Hi Phil,
seems you are being put through the mill! (No Pun intended cause youre a Miller;)! I cannot say that I understand your tolerance:confused:, I would probably have played things differentley, but then again I have No Kids (so I do not know what I am talking about:o).

If once everything is sorted out with your son, and you both want a break (Germany), give me a bell, you are more than welcome for a short break.

Dunk

[DSG4ME]

Phil, you are a magnet for the wrong type, I hope you get to see your kid, and the fact she's being so objectional is a modern day Brit thing, if the boot was on the other foot she'd be slitting her wrists, yet you are supposed to fade away.


One did it to my mate, he hasn't seen his girl since she was 18 mths old, she's 19 now.

[Bratty]

Dsg4me, respect your ability to spell whilst wriled! , would invite you also for a break! But how many Axe-wielding murderers can a houshold sustain at one time (do not mean you phil!);).

Dunk

[phil miller]

Hi Phil,
seems you are being put through the mill! (No Pun intended cause youre a Miller;)! I cannot say that I understand your tolerance:confused:, I would probably have played things differentley, but then again I have No Kids (so I do not know what I am talking about:o).

If once everything is sorted out with your son, and you both want a break (Germany), give me a bell, you are more than welcome for a short break.

Dunk

Thank you for your kind offer, hopefully when all is sorted i will take you up on that, Thank you mate :beerchug:

[Guest 2]

Keep at it Phil! It will all work out well in the end!

[Bratty]

Thank you for your kind offer, hopefully when all is sorted i will take you up on that, Thank you mate :beerchug:

No Probs.

Dunk

[bricam1]

You have had a rotten year. You are clearly a loving father who wants to be in the child’s life not some deadbeat who could not care less. I can only presume from previous posts that she is just nasty if she does not get her own way. At the end of the day the only person that suffers is the child.
Please also be careful as to what you post as you do not know who reads these threads especially as it is now in the hand of the lawyers.
Hope all goes well.

[fat controller]

its been hard, i got the letter on june the 19 (dated the 5 :confused:) saying id been turned down, so after talking to my solictor he said i would need to fill out the forms again, in late oct i filled out the paper work at my solictors office and was told he would submit it as soon as he could and i was to not rock the boat and not to go down to her house as that would make things worse, its been a very long wait but im glad we can get the ball rolling, just a shame its a little to late for christmas, im sure even if a letter was sent tomorrow she would drag her feet till the new year, but a new year a new start:) , im hoping my little man can spend time with me without the court having to tell his mum, i know ive said this a few times but i class all of you as my friends on here even tho ive never met you :beerchug:

Its going to be tough for you over Christmas though - it always is the worst time of year to be away from loved ones - I'm just glad that you've got something to look forward to in the new year :)

I'd class you as a friend too mate, despite never having met - there are a few posters on here that seem thoroughly decent sorts that I would class as friends too - I'd certainly do my best to never see them stuck, that's for sure. :beerchug:

[phil miller]

Its going to be tough for you over Christmas though - it always is the worst time of year to be away from loved ones - I'm just glad that you've got something to look forward to in the new year :)

I'd class you as a friend too mate, despite never having met - there are a few posters on here that seem thoroughly decent sorts that I would class as friends too - I'd certainly do my best to never see them stuck, that's for sure. :beerchug:

Thank you mate, i just cant get in to the whole christmas thing this year, but as mum told me, not this one but next year we can make up for it when he is opening his presents

:beerchug:

[MalcQV]

Good news Phil http://www.windowsguide.org/forum/images/smilies/thumbsup.gif

[phil miller]

Just a little update, following on from my last letter i had to send them 6 months of bank statements for all of my accounts, which i did, TODAY i received my funding certificate, Which means by solicitor can now start court proceedings, in short he will wright to my ex explaining that due to contact failing and the way she stopped contact he is applying to the court for a hearing, fingers crossed that will kick her in to action and she will do her best to agree to contact to save having to go before a judge, she has no valid reason to have stopped contact, and i have all of the text mgs she sent to confirm why she stopped contact, not the path i wanna take but if needs be going to court doesnt worry me, hopefully within the next week or so the ball will be rolling

what a great way for my new year to start, ive got this far on HOPE and i must say its been well worth the wait

watch this space ;)

[stuart]

Good news.... :) Hope all goes well now....

[Zeb]

Best of luck, and I hope all goes well :)

[MFGF]

We are all rooting for you Phil!

[johnloaderuk]

Having never been in that position myself I can only imagine what it's been like for you in the past. Families and loved ones are the best thing ever when it all goes right, and the worst thing ever when it goes wrong.

At least there's a bright light at the end of the tunnel, I hope it all goes ok for you :beerchug:.

[phil miller]

well update time, met with my solictor today and have been given an address ;) now papers can be served on her, all the paper work has been filled out so within the next couple of weeks i should get the date of when it starts, hopefully it wont be a long drawn out battle, all i want is to see them, its been almost 12 months my girls have grown up so much i would have thought

[Guest 2]

That's excellent news Phil, I'm sure it will all work out and the end result will be great :)

Keep us updated

[fat controller]

Good news Phil - glad to hear that things are finally heading your way! :)

[gazza57]

Some of you may remember from the summer about my hassel with my ex over contact with my son, anyway after appling for legal aid and being turned down things went from bad to worse, the last time i saw my son was the 30 aug, it all stopped after i was told if i didnt hand over £105 i wouldnt see him again:( i stood my ground and true to her word i havent seen him and i get no answer from any calls or texts asking about my son :zx11: but i waited as you have to and reapplied, today thro the post i had the letter i have been praying for, i have been excepted for legal aid which (after a call tomorrow) will mean my solictor can get the ball rolling and hopefully bring an end to my excile from my son, he will be 2 in march so after a 4 month gap it will be hard to start with, there is light at the end of the tunnel hopefully it wont take long to get there

so as you can understand im buzzing :arms::banana::arms:
Phil,
I sympathise with your position mate, to stop you seeing your son is a cruel and vindictive thing to do.
What your ex is doing apart from using your son as a weapon with which she can hurt you is also depriving her son of the opportunity to see his Dad.
Can't she see that in punishing you, she is also punishing him.
And in time he will grow to resent the fact that she used him as a weapon with which to get back at you , as he is very young he will not understand why he can't see his Dad but once he is mature enough to see what she is doing he will grow to resent her which also is not good for him either.
Whatever has gone on in the past, she should give you proper access to your son as much for his sake as an innocent in all this.

Gazza57

[andy e]

some good news at last phil, just keep all of us posted, rooting for you mate, when it is all over i might just give you this:grouphug:

[DSG4ME]

Phil, let this be a lesson to you in future, later in life you might find she wants you back, you have to go around all the niceties she might put infront of you, always remember these days, I tell you this because a mate of mine got hot fat chucked over him while he was in bed one day because the weirdo he chose as a partner got it in her head he was sharing it around, he wasn't but it's left him with a scarred face and chest, and the dopey sod took her back some time later, and he is the original dopey sod an'all, sometime in the future I expect to hear she's stabbed him or something, cos leopard's never change.

[phil miller]

Phil, let this be a lesson to you in future, later in life you might find she wants you back, you have to go around all the niceties she might put infront of you, always remember these days, I tell you this because a mate of mine got hot fat chucked over him while he was in bed one day because the weirdo he chose as a partner got it in her head he was sharing it around, he wasn't but it's left him with a scarred face and chest, and the dopey sod took her back some time later, and he is the original dopey sod an'all, sometime in the future I expect to hear she's stabbed him or something, cos leopard's never change.

Trust me mate once bitten twice shy and all that, ive got a feeling my phone will be turned off for a couple of days around the time she gets served the papers, she will either offer contact (on her terms) or call me to wind me up like a coiled spring, im above all of that, all i want is my childern to have there right to see me granted, i can be nice for the 2 secounds of hand overs doesnt mean i like her, more to make it easier for my son

he is after all the only person thats important in all of this

ive heard today it will be in Plymouth CC so not far to travel :D

[bricam1]

If she try’s to phone you make sure it goes to voicemail. That way if she leaves any unpleasantness you have it all recorded.

[Mini Mark]

Glad your getting somewhere Phil hope its all sorted soon

[stuart]

If she try’s to phone you make sure it goes to voicemail. That way if she leaves any unpleasantness you have it all recorded.

Good advice there;)

[phil miller]

small update, ive got my dates for the first hearing, from there the judge will decide what info he/she wants (cafcass reports, my ablity to house and school them, that sort of thing) from there it will then be a case of putting forward proof i will be able to A, manage and be the children will be safe and well looked after

it will be at the first hearing that offers will be made, like you can see them every weekend or they can stay everyother weekend, now altho that is the ideal answer i strongly believe we have long since past the point of making deals, it was her choice to stop contact and there is no garantee to stop that in the future

end of the month is when it all starts :o

[Mini Mark]

Thats good nes best of luck with it mate:beerchug:

[fat controller]

I think you have got quite a bit to go through yet mate - judges aren't exactly renowned for being in touch with real life :banghead:

But, you are off to a good start, and as long as you hold your nerve, stay ultra-reasonable at all times (no matter how you are provoked), you will hopefully get a satisfactory result.

I've got everything crossed for you mate. :beerchug:

[hibbsy21]

Good luck phil. You are a real father trying to get everything sorted.
My parents split a few years back, Dad is a ****, was never around, albeit he was away in the falklands and iraq, but its just the lack of effort when he was home with me and my brother.

It was three years ago, and i havent received as much as a text messege. I know my situation is different to yours but keep going and dont give up mate! Clearly you are a dedicated father and deserve to see your child! As for the ex....well she is just evil, and as said in a previous post, just using your son as a weapon!

Good luck buddy! Hope all goes well!!

[phil miller]

Now long time and up until the other week nothing had happened and i hadnt moved forward, about 4 weeks ago i had to work saturday morning at mid day i was asked to drop a car back to its owner in plymouth, i was driving back in the loaner and decided to get a mc ds for lunch, i pulled in to the drivetho and it was heavy going in and out im sat there in the works S70 and looked over at the car leaving, it was my EX bingo, i saw my little boy in the back christ he's grown up since last august (my legal team had problems finding her to serve her papers) i swung round and got the REG of the bmw she was driving (find that car, find my son) so i went out for a drive in plymouth that night looking for the car, no joy, so i emailed the details to my solicitor and 5 days later i got the email id been waiting for, she had been served papers and we were in court the following monday (last monday) WINNER.

i turned up at court and after 2 hours we had agreed to 3 fortnightly contacts of 2 hours followed by 3 at 4 hours, my first one is this coming saturday, one small problem, her mum will attend to put Jakes mind at rest while we rebuild the bond, its been a long 10 months and has cost me dear, im now single (not thro my own choice) ive also found im not keen to go out our than to work, the main thing is the futures bright......... the futures red and white lol

hopefully this is the start of the good times

[fat controller]

Good thinking getting that registration number mate! You must be like a dog with two willies in a field full of lamp posts, and quite rightly so :)

Hopefully, these visits will lead to many more, and much more consistent contact for you - I'll keep my fingers crossed for you mate :)

[Guest 2]

Thats great news Phil. Hope everything from this point onwards will go in your favour!

As FC said, good job in getting the plate, must've been your lucky day!

Happy Fathers Day too!

[phil miller]

Thanks lads I got lucky when it comes to cars I remember them and Reg numbers I'm really looking forward to Saturday I bet he is walking and talking now so it will be a little hard keeping the lump in my throat and tears from my eyes, once again thanks lads


WE SENT THEM DOWN, WE SENT THEM DOOOWN, PLYMOUTH ARGYLE, WE SENT THEM DOWN

[gazza57]

So phil you're not a fan of the janners?

Gazza57

[gazza57]

Great news about your lad!

It shows you though how cruel some people can be, he's as much your son as hers and perhaps you'd like to ask her how she'd have felt had you deprived her of access to her son as she has so deprived you?
The main thing though is to get her committed to giving you the access to your son regularly, a court ruling will help I reckon and if the courts have any sense, cutting off contact as she has done will not show her in a very favourable light.

Well done mate,

Gazza57

[phil miller]

So phil you're not a fan of the janners?

Gazza57


Lol no I was born on the other side of the moor and Exeter City are my team I'm very proud to be a grecian and loving the way the team down the A38 have fallen apart lol

[gazza57]

Phil,
I'm a Southampton fan and we had a couple of good games against you last season, good luck for 2011/12

All the best Gaz

[phil miller]

Phil,
I'm a Southampton fan and we had a couple of good games against you last season, good luck for 2011/12

All the best Gaz

Well technically you set the janners down but I will always claim it was us for bragging rights lol, hmm yes a 4 nil mauling at your place and I'm still kicking myself about the home game, but as I've always been told you don't win a game in 70mins

Good luck next season hope you follow Norwich, your a big club, to big for league 1 that's for sure

[phil miller]

Havent updated this for a while so here goes, in sept had a court hearing and was given 2 hours a fortnight then after 2 times went to 4 then up to 8 hours, all going very well, we had another update hearing on wednesday just gone, and the out come is beyond my hopes and dreams, starting jan the 13 i pick him up on a friday at 6pm and drop him home 6pm on the sunday, i get to see him EVERY wednesday from 6pm till 7:30pm and get to call him twice a week to help build on our bond, this is a final hearing so aslong as things continue to flow as they have been i wont have to go to court again for contact with my son, ive gone from 8 hrs a fortnight to 49 and a half hrs a fortnight, im totally made up and its the perfect christmas present for me, my son and my family

[fat controller]

Great news Phil! :) :)

[MalcQV]

:D Great News.

[bricam1]

Well done - Great News.

[andy e]

thats great news, all the best,:You_Rock_