Stupid things you've done involving a motor vehicle...

[Sam]

After reading a thread on another forum about a service manager who drove a Passat with a bike strapped to the roof into a service area without first checking the door was fully open, it made me think of the stupid vehicle related things I've done (or seen);

Disclaimer - these all happened about 10 years ago.

I drove >15 miles with a double mattress on the roof of my 1972 Bug. My roofrack was a bath towel, and my method of tie down was my right arm.

My old man reversed his car out of his driveway with the drivers door open. The gatepost caused the door to open so much that it folded against the front wing - thankfully it didn't come right off.

I reversed my mum's Pug 505 GTi estate (awesome car!) into the garage with the tailgate open. It hooked onto a ladder stored in the roof void and picked the back end of the car up off the floor - that wasn't fun.

Same car as above - I reversed out of my parents driveway and in a moment of showing-off madness, drove straight into the wall over the road. We hastily rebuilt the wall using some sand and a bottle of 7-up. This story was told, by my mate, at my wedding. Neither my parents, nor their neighbours (who were at the wedding) new of the accident and I'd actually forgotten all about it until then.

While trying to prove to my mate (and the other 4 passengers) that you could spin the tyres of a RWD car (same 505 again) I managed to fishtail back and forth down a single track road lined with cars on both sides for a good mile or so and not hit anything at all. I changed my underpants shortly after.

The same car again, same day too, I got airborne with 6 passengers and myself on board. For a 5 metre car, fully laden, I was impressed.

There are many more, but I'd better stop before I incriminate myself further.

[Captain Answer]

Whilst I worked for a car auctioneers for a summer driving cars:

Wrote off a focus on an island, ploughed across the centre then spun twice before kindly being stopped by a fence

Blew out the speakers on a 911 on its way to its new owner

Went the wrong way and went 10 junctions the wrong way on the M1

Numerous bumps, scrapes and misdemenors which were never realised :D

[Eshrules]

the most embarrassing one has to be when i went out in my mums land rover discovery 300 tdi (95 m plate) having been driving it quite a bit and been in the field concerned quite a lot recently, i decided to be a bit more adventurous, this was my undoing.

not only did i fail to realise the ditch on the other side of the fence would quite easily swallow up my disco, but i also didnt notice the deep i was getting myself into.

with my tail between my legs and having tried to get it out myself, i reported the incident to my mother, who proceeded to burn the clutch out.

1 1/2 hours later, 2 farmers, myself and my mother and a ruddy great tractor with tow rope and we were out of the field.:o

[new to vw]

whilst changing the oil on a rover sd1 2.6...left the plug out of the sump ond poured 5lt of oil straight through the engine.....lol..never done that one again..:D
lee

[Ben]

I'M IN TEARS :Screem: SOME VERY FUNNY STORIES

[Dozz]

Watched a empty cardboard box blow out in front of my car. Stopped reversed to then drive round said empty box and backed straight into the car behind

[Big_E]

Shoved Potatoe's up a exhuast pipe of a VW Beetle, that was restored to ****, when I was a nipper.

Advised a friend to use a sock as an oil cap when he lost his somehow, he took me serious.

Advised the same friend to go to Motor World and order a 710 Cap, after reading a joke on a forum about it. ( turn 710 riggh 180 degrees..! )

[devonutopia]

Changed a headlight bulb, car ground to a halt 3 miles later with seized gearbox. Not realising a link I called out the AA and Mr AA man came along and retrieved my headlight cover out of my gearbox cables - which I'd left on top of the engine, and just shut the bonnet and drove off. :D

I did it again a couple of years later but remembered VIVIDLY, so had the cover whipped out myself in 30 seconds and secured properly.

[RickT]

After blowing a sycro on the gearbox on my old Cavalier.. replaced and fitted... topped up with oil... forgot to replace the sump plug with the AA man kindly lost when i got recovered after he started do his bit of testing.. (i never knew it have be removed..) went for a drive.. all was fine.. went on the motorway the follwing day... lost all gears!!

say no more :aargh4:


Rick

[RickT]

and one the other day....

filled up with fuel... paid on the card at the pay and pump.. in a rush.. somehow forgot to put the fuel cap back on.. 9was in a rush and was more worried about the machine not returning my card.. forgot to screw it back on...

After about 10 miles or so of hearing a funning knocking noise.. i stopped.. walked around the car and saw it.. the flap had closed with the wind and have a nice petrol smelling rear wing and bumper!!

RickT

[MalcQV]

Re fuel cap.
Reminds me of my wife's car. She lets me fill it up for her :D. I was at Tesco and used to use the "pay at pump" thingy. On one particular day I had trouble chasing the receipt across the windy forecourt and forgot to put the fuel cap on. I just leave it next to the filler pipe on the top of the wing. I had closed the flap too.
Got home and realised it was missing. Me and the missus back tracked my journey to the patrol station and found the cap in the gutter about a mile from the petrol station.

After reconditioning the engine in my old MKIII Tina, I tried to get it started but struggled. My dad towed me down the road and we managed to bump start it. I went around the block only about 10 mins and got home to realise I had not filled it with coolant. Luckily it was only a 10 minute drive :Blush2:

[Sam]

Thought of more :Blush2:

First outing in my newly acquired automatic Golf. Never having driven an auto before I was a little naive.

Raced up the road in D(rive) listening to the engine, anticipating the gear change, and when it was time to change, moved the gear selector from D (which in my head was 1st) to P(ark) (which in my head was 2nd).

I flat spotted two front tyres and left very long skid marks which are still on the road some 10 years later.

[Captain Answer]

Started my g'f car, heard that the roller had broken on the cam belt, rather than ring for recovery i drove it 10 miles home, put in the new one the next day and it has run sweetly ever since

[nickynibbles]

1st car was a lovely Austin Maestro 1.3L, great car for ripping to pieces on your driveway with a haynes manual & putting back together again, was just like meccano! Plenty of them on the scrap heap too so parts were never a problem! Whatever happened to the trip to the scrapyard when you need a part? Too much emphasis on Halfords etc etc these days! Stupidest thing with that car was one day filling the car up & thinking to myself i could smell petrol quite strongly. Turns out the fuel filler pipe had a hole in and the fuel nozzle was poking out of it, all the fuel was going straight on the ground!! A close 2nd was my great plan to use Reddex engine cleaner on the car. At the time had just finished uni & had just started work as a manager at a Beefeater restaurant. Anyway, bunged the bottle of Reddex into the inlet manifold as instructed and admired the ploom of white smoke that billowed from the exhaust. What I hadnt noticed was the air vent in the wall near the exhaust pipe & a good quantity of the smoke was being pumped into the restaurant!! Luckily this was in the morning & it wasnt open but it didnt impress the general manager one bit who came running out the back door to make me move the car!!! In my last car which was a Mk4 Astra estate I inherited when my dad passed away I had one moment of fun! There's a big roundabout on my way home from work with several sets of traffic lights on it. My mate & I who I car share with used to ponder the posibilty of making it all the way around the roundabout without hitting a red light, we decided if you booted it off the line, the 1st set of lights turned amber as you got near the line & the next set were just about to hit red when you hit that line. So one day in a 1.8 ton Astra estate car with a 1.8 16v engine to pull it along I gave it a go & it just worked! Its not a problem in the 3.0 Quattro Sport but its more fun when its riskier in a brick of a car!!!!

[bora(ing) nick]

Whilst learning to drive with my dad....

I was driving to work 1 morning in his Skoda Fabia 1.9td and noticed the fuel gauge looked low...

He said pull into the nearest garage and fill up.... So i pull up, he hands me the money and i proceed to re-fuel the car... after approx a fivers worth of fuel went in a realised i was putting petrol in and promptly "browned my trousers" (my dad is not a very understanding man).

Anyway, i went in and paid for the petrol, and ask the attendant what i should do... He said if i fill it up with diesel it'll be alright, because some lorry's do it to clear out the injectors.

Luckyly it was ok, no side effects at all. phew

Nick

[bora(ing) nick]

Just remembered another 1....

Before i passed my test, i bought a liitle Fiat Panda... (i know what your thinking but this 1 was cool, 14 inch alloys, double sun roof, spoiler, and it had a 1 litre turbo engine in it, which had been imported from italy that was out of a car called a "Y90") for £50 just because the doors were rusted to pieces and it neede tyres all round.

Anyway, my mate was a bit of a bad boy when he was younger and bought a an F reg BMW 730i for £600 from a guy down the road. I don't know how he never got pulled...

1 night he pulled up outside my house, walked straight through my front door and grabbed the keys to the panda. I was half asleep at the time but remember hearing the car start and wheelspin away. another "mate" of mine was driving the BMW and they headed for the fields near my house...

I got my bike out and followed them down and watched them totally destroy both cars. crashing into each other, the Beamer was doing dough-nuts whilst the panda was just getting bogged down spinning the wheels.

I got my £50 back but never spoke to any of them again. who needs "mates" like that!

[bora(ing) nick]

oh, and i've rammed a rolling automatic car into park as well... Not a good experience.

Nick

[hahshem]

When i was very young my mum let me drive her fiat panda up my road, when it got 2 stopping, i put my foot on the gas instead of the brake and wnt str8 into our porch, smashing the wing and light.
My mum took responsibility, n my dad doesnt no any different still 2day.lol

[MalcQV]

Just drove my car onto a rock on the side of the road this weekend :p
Couple of cable clips and the plastic insert looks like new. Either I am getting old and senile or this car is cursed :Blush2:

[Eshrules]

im the same for accidents and dings, i've managed to 'ahem' roll into the back of a ring and ride van, thankfully, it was my fiat and the bumper was made of jelly, the driver giggled at me and said not to worry :o

i've managed to roll back into my mums TD5 discovery, again with the fiat :o jelly bumper saved me again.

i've also, rather annoyingly, caught my front skirt skirt several times on those stupid low kerbs at supermarkets you can't actually see until you hear the scraping noise.

id love an R32 kit fitted, but i daren't because of the above :(

[BROWN_OWL]

hand an air filter fitted to my old car (honda civic) and noticed that i couldnt select 3rd or 5 th or reverse. so decided to use the free AA cover i got with the car and well lets say at 3am and them saying it will take about 2 hours to get to you sir i thought i'll ave a look only to find my air filter had fallen into the gearbox linkages and was being crushed everytime i tried to change gear. Needless to say near airfilter and a rather embaressed call back to the AA saying i didnt need them. BEst part was the AA van drove past me as i droe home!!!!!!!

[Lord Nelson]

about a year after i passed my test i had an old Nova SR. I thought it was like a go-kart....i soon realised it wasnt after i had been karting when on the way home, i ploughed into a field thinking i could take a corner like i would in a real go-kart. Me and my mate just sat there laughing and luckily no damage was done...although i was, and still am to the day ridiculed about it.

Another time was when i just bought some new alloys for my Bravo...was in a bit of a rush to fit them as i had to be somewhere....i picked my mate up on the way and about 4 miles into my journey, i kept hearing a really strange knocking noise...opened the window and i couldnt figure out what it was....so i stoped the car and checked round only to find one of the wheels was about to fall off as i forgot to fasten the wheel nuts properly!!
:Blush2: close call id say.

[Captain Answer]

about a year after i passed my test i had an old Nova SR. I thought it was like a go-kart....i soon realised it wasnt after i had been karting when on the way home, i ploughed into a field thinking i could take a corner like i would in a real go-kart. Me and my mate just sat there laughing and luckily no damage was done...although i was, and still am to the day ridiculed about it.

Another time was when i just bought some new alloys for my Bravo...was in a bit of a rush to fit them as i had to be somewhere....i picked my mate up on the way and about 4 miles into my journey, i kept hearing a really strange knocking noise...opened the window and i couldnt figure out what it was....so i stoped the car and checked round only to find one of the wheels was about to fall off as i forgot to fasten the wheel nuts properly!!
:Blush2: close call id say.

This happened to my mum but it was driving home for the GARAGE who'd done some suspension work, nedless to say there was a lot of shouting down a phone

[bora(ing) nick]

about a year after i passed my test i had an old Nova SR. I thought it was like a go-kart....i soon realised it wasnt after i had been karting when on the way home, i ploughed into a field thinking i could take a corner like i would in a real go-kart. Me and my mate just sat there laughing and luckily no damage was done...although i was, and still am to the day ridiculed about it.

Another time was when i just bought some new alloys for my Bravo...was in a bit of a rush to fit them as i had to be somewhere....i picked my mate up on the way and about 4 miles into my journey, i kept hearing a really strange knocking noise...opened the window and i couldnt figure out what it was....so i stoped the car and checked round only to find one of the wheels was about to fall off as i forgot to fasten the wheel nuts properly!!
:Blush2: close call id say.


I too had a Nova, but only a 1.2.... (looked like an SR)

I did the same as you, just pulled out of Daytona Karting in trafford park manchester and turned left onto the dual carriage way.... adrenaline still pumping from a 3 hour endurance race, i put my foot down and was fast approaching the round about...

As you've already probably guessed, i tried to steer the car around the round about, but went straight over it instead.... and for those that don't know that particular round about, it's big one!

Kerbed both my front alloys and snapped my front right wishbone :Blush2:

Got stick for weeks after that...

[cairnsie13]

Had a old mini cooper. Was repairing handbrake quadrent on one side. Fasten wheel back on and left wheel brace outside for 15 mins while i check haynes manual. Took the car for a test drive. Turned round a roundabout and though the car feels feels really unstable i'll pull over. As i turn the corner my wheel shoots off and bounced beween 2 gate posts luckily not hitting anyone or anything. Every wheel on car had a nut loose kids could have killed me or somone lol

[MalcQV]

Mother-in-law was complaining for a good few weeks about a knocking noise on the front of her Fiesta. When checking I noticed I had not tightened up the wheel nuts. She probably still thinks to this day it was deliberate :p.

I know that roundabout left out of the Karting centre. It is big :eek:

[Veedubber]

:D Hilarious. Mine's very tame in comparison.

I booked my 205GTi in for a new clutch (and took it in) when actually the mats had got all curled up behind the pedal. :Blush2:

I have been overtaken by my own wheel but it was an old Datsun FII or something like that and it was a miracle it stayed on as long as it did.

Unless I've blocked any from my memory, that's it.:o

[Jimbo1.8t]

work buddy bought a new pug 407, parked it in his drive and went in his house, later that day came out to find his car missing, looked about for it the car had rolled acrossed a two lane road and into a wall smashing the rear light and bumper, he hadn't put the hand brake on!!


got in the back of a mates three door car drunk, started driving and asked the person in front to open the windw cause i didn't feel well and was sick down his neck!!:puke:

[gemjampot]

just after i passed my driving test i thought i'd risk reverse parking my polo in the garage. i was doing well until i heard an awful metal grating noise, so, i drove forward again to stop it and the noise got louder. no matter which way i went the noise got louder. i parked up, got out to find i'd squashed the BBQ between the side of my car and the garage wall! it was now oval!!
http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:Sk7DyEUIlUtaxM:http://www.lakewoodconferences.com/direct/dbimage/50354836/Charcoal_BBQ_Grill.jpg

[stratocaste1]

whilst on one of the first and few driving lessons i had,

driving through letchworth, pigeons in the road, i slowed down not wanting to scare the kids in town, instructor said, no drive towards them theyll get out of the way,

and they did, great i thought, so 20 minutes later driving down a country lane theres a rabbit in the middle of the road, accelerating im thinking it'l just hop out the way,

then me and the instructor nearly go through the windscreen as he slams the dual brakes on, leaving a massive 11 mark in our wake,

then turns to me and says "ya know rabbits arnt like pigeons"

poor thing musta thought i was trying for some roadkill,

another time in my mates clio, him driving, a little quick down some country roads (he got a days rally course for his bday) we go over a crest niether of us realised was quite so big, somewhere inbetween taking off and landing i managed to dent his roof (from the inside!) he still has a head inprint on his roof lining lol

[1.8t bus]

1991 1 month after passing my test was out in my mums fiat 126 with a friend you no how it is 17 years old best driver in the world .driving through local village trys to take a sharp left to fast didnt think much was wrong until radio cassette flew out then landed inside the car but on the roof at this point it suddenly dawned on me we were sliding down the road on the roof.only cuts an bumps no big injuries to either of us until went to court and got 9 points and 1000 pound fine for driving without due care and attention. still go slow round that corner to this day.

[hagis]

Six years ago, I took my new girlfriend for a weekend in the Lake Distict. We went for a drive round a few back roads and I saw a ford. I hadn't driven through one for ages, but the old C-reg Micra I used to have went through them no problem.

Alas, the Clio's air intake was at the bottom of the engine, not the top (stupid design). We got about 10 foot across before the engine seized. We climbed out of the car, Dukes of Hazzard style (the missus was in a skirt and boots) and an old couple waited an hour with us until the AA managed to find us and tow us back to the hotel. The water in the engine bent two of the con roads but I managed to get it repaired for £400. I used to have one of the bent con rods, quite an achivement.

We'll be married a year in October and have a baby on the way, so it didn't put her off me!

[MalcQV]

That ^ reminds me of my first proper date with my (now) missus.

I put a pair of 25% uprated springs on the front of my Tina on the morning/afternoon I was taking her out. I turned up in the most ridiculous looking car with the front end about 2"-3" higher than the back.

Following day I took the springs off the front and put them straight in the bin.

[hagis]

Perhaps the up-rated springs would have been better in the back ;-)

[MalcQV]

Perhaps the up-rated springs would have been better in the back ;-)

Great first date that would of been :D
Mind you I would of been free and single now!

[cbrpaul]

Guys stop your giving all vw drivers a bad name !!!!!


:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

ok , my 1st car , a mk1 Escort , parked it by the side of kids park area, the grass was long , as i reversed in i heard a scraping and metallic crushing sound , !!!


Upon getting out for a look , the edge of the park had small concrete pillars that were hidden by the long grass ,


I had a 2 ft scrape along the side of the car and all the side seal was pushed in about 8" !!!

[Big_E]

Tried to perform hand brake turns with 5 people in a fiat punto, and smashed into a kerb.

Tskkk.

[Karlos_Fandango]

and one the other day....

filled up with fuel... paid on the card at the pay and pump.. in a rush.. somehow forgot to put the fuel cap back on.. 9was in a rush and was more worried about the machine not returning my card.. forgot to screw it back on...

After about 10 miles or so of hearing a funning knocking noise.. i stopped.. walked around the car and saw it.. the flap had closed with the wind and have a nice petrol smelling rear wing and bumper!!

RickT


My ex girlfriend (she hates being called that, so I will call her my ex-bird from now on, she'll just love me for that :) ) Bought an identical MK4 150TDi as mine, having had a 16V Daggy Probe for years. Second time she filled it up from empty tank...filled up with £50 of unleaded. Last I heard, the injectors are still playing up, 18 months down the line ;)

[Riven]

I think a lot of us have been here at some time!!

A few years ago I drove my company car (A Ford Mondeo) in to a garage and filled it right up with unleaded........And I mean right up!.

Not a nice thing to do to a diesel engine!!!

Needless to say the inevitable conk out and tank drain cost me over a hundred quid and a very red face!

[RickT]

Going back to one of my first driving lessons..

I remember i must have only drove the leaner car twice and was heading down my street at the time at about 20 mph when the neighbors dog ran out........ bang.......

I remember my driving instructor saying to me "thats was the sound of a dog hitting the car...."

Anyway.. as we was going so slow the dog was fine and carried on his daily walk with its owner...

RickT

[Veedubber]

I caved in the back of a hire car.

I had gone on holiday to Portugal and while sunning myself, had my beloved 205 GTi stolen from residential area in Glasgow. I had to hire a car to get me home from Glasgow to Aberdeen - a rover of some sort :vomit:

I angrily drove all the way back, parked in the hotel car park where I was to return the car to. The receptionist, without even so much as looking up at me, told me I had parked in the wrong car park and it should be the one across the road.

I went angrily back out to said rover, got in, reversed at high speed while looking at the end bollard in a row of bollards in my driver's mirror... only to find that it wasn't ACTUALLY the end bollard, but the next one to the end one. Absolutely and completely caved the back of the car in.

Drove forward enough to get it off the bollard and went back in to the hotel. Huffily told the girl "Here's your hire car keys. It's parked in the wrong car park and you may want to keep the insurance deposit"

It was quite satisfying, to be honest, and helped dissipate the anger. The insurance deposit was £100 and you know what, it was probably just about £100 well spent.

[Matt-h]

I was working in car sales at the time (:o) and decided to buy a 3 yr old bmw 318, after a couple of weeks a cheap 205gti came up for sale, so i bought that too (as a play car).

My dad wanted to borrow the bmw to go up country and kindly lent me his keys to a v6 calibra.

I Was out with my mates and on the way home, had to avoid a horse in the new forest and ditched it.
I had twisted the chassis!

So, he had my bmw while he sorted his insurance claim. i was out again with some mates in the gti and wanted to drive the bmw, so i swapped them round only to write it off on a roundabout.

So my dad (who was not impressed) had to use my 205 while i had a courtesy car for the bmw.
Whilst out looking at a flat to rent i went over a narrow bridge and had a head on with someone else.

So in the space of 2 weeks a had written off my dads calibra, binned my bwm and knackered a courtesy car.
Needless to say they have never let me forget it:o

[Ben]

Bringing another classic old thread to the fore for some of our more recent members.

Thanks for finding it sam.:Blush:

[macmillions]

My Golf had a flat battery a few months ago, so jump started it with my clio, "Excellent!" I thought, and then, while im at it, ill go put some fuel in the car, so drove half a mile up the road, filled up with fuel to the brim (the right fuel I might add, unlike some other people:beerchug:) went to start it again... nothing...

Clever old me had only let the engine run 4 about 2 minutes, so the battery was as flat as when I had first jump started it!

To add insult to injury, I must have been parked in the only petrol station in the whole country with the forecourt built on an uphill slope meaning I couldn;t push the car out the way, so had to sit there like a moron with a queue the size of a football pitch forming behind me whilst I ran home to pick up my other car so I could jump start the Golf again!:banghead:

[StuPDi]

done a few silly things in my early days!!!!!!!!

but only a couple recently.

i am very particular about where i park in public carparks, this 1 time i managed to get myself a double space in a multi-storey due to a couple of cones and a barrier.

having been so proud that nobody could whack thier doors into my car, i stupidly ran over a cone with the back wheel, and the whole barrier smacked the side of the car leaving a rather large dent in my drivers door!!!! to say i was not best pleased is a bit of an understatement!!!!!!


cant really explain the other, but it involves a brand new Ibiza and a bollard, then "noticing" a huge scrape and dent after!!

Stu

[bonerpart1]

The most stupid thing i have done is going back 20 years ago I returned home after borrowing my dads car stopped on the drive which had a slight slop down got out the car and started to lift the garage door when the car slowly rolled down the slop and wedged my legs against the door the only problem was there was no one around to help me push the car back as the handbrake was on but not on high enought so after shouting for help for an hour I was bursting for a wee and decided I need to go now half way through my nan who was lived with us appeared looking rather shocked and discusted ive never been so embarrised and now every chrismas this story is told to my embarrisment

[dansansome]

lol, thats awesome. you'll never be allowed to forget that. your nan caught you urinating on your dads car, and once you pop, you cant stop lol.

stupid things ive done...hmmm. i bought a peugeot.

while demonstrating to a friend that "i know the width of my car" i managed to tear off my passenger wing mirror as it hit the wing mirror of a parked van. other than that, i cant recall doing anything overly stupid.

[macmillions]

I cant take the claim for this one, but i found it hilarious all the same. My mate was driving a Mondeo through a narrow one way street. When turning left at the bottom of the road, a lorry was parked unloading its goods, there was a small space between the lorry and a lamp post, so in his wisdom he decided he would, and I quote: "just brush past it". In doing so he ripped the passenger door off!

[Dudey Head]

Mrs Dudey has got an automatic Lupo & my trusty old Coupe is a manual. My brain tends to neglect to bear in mind which transmission is in which car. If I've driven them both in the same day I panic because the clutch 'has disappeared' in the Lupo & think my gearbox has had it in the Coupe because it won't go into gear with my foot on the brake! Duuuuhhhh...
Perhaps I should sleep more!

[marjm66]

Don't know if this is a joke or genuine, made me laugh.

decide for yourselves.

This isn't me by the way.

http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm (http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm)

cheers
Mark

[devsgolf]

Don't know if this is a joke or genuine, made me laugh.

decide for yourselves.

This isn't me by the way.

http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm (http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm)

cheers
Mark


Oh for trumpets sake!! Thank you man. That was just the kinda pick-me-up i needed all day. Excelent. What a plonker.

[StuPDi]

funny

pmsl


Stu

[MalcQV]

Only read page 1 so far. Must pass this on.

:beerchug:

[RichardCranium]

Most stupid thing i've done is bought a cut-and-shut when i was a teenager. Vauxhall Nova 1.4 SR. Foolish, foolish boy. Made it look reasonable and traded it in for a 1991 Mini Cooper. I ahd the last laugh as the garage's computer system was down at the time so the couldnt HPI it until the deal was done. When they kicked off, my retort was 'sorry mate, sold as seen' and put the phone down. Never heard from them again.

More recently, i put unleaded in my diesel Volvo! £160 to get the tank drained:Blush2:

[hagis]

When they kicked off, my retort was 'sorry mate, sold as seen' and put the phone down. Never heard from them again.


:D

[Eshrules]

'someone', erm, that I 'know' managed to roll into the back (very slowly apparently) of a ring and ride bus, whilst 'their' , erm, missus, was busy making them look at a vw golf, which they later bought.

the ring and ride bus (and all its passengers) were apparently ok, the front bumper of the car, from what I've been told, was not.

kids, eh :Blush2:

[P0WERS160]

Drove into front porch due to the fact that I cannot steer (fitted bigger wheels and a smaller steering wheel....MISTAKE!) and brake at the same time...but hey, i'm allowed, I'm a learner ;)

[sdk778]

Had a 1988 XR2, some sod ran up the **** of it causing quite a dent, thought it would be a cracking idea to tie a chain around the rear towing eye and then wrap said chain around a 'stout' tree trunk, drive forward pulling dent out at the same time, easy.
My Dad still misses that tree, loved it he did.
Seems the old XR2 was built better than i thought.
Doh!

Remembering that, quite recently i thought it would be a good idea to 'help' a friend out who wanted a tree trunk taking out, he has a Discovery, i had a chain, what could go wrong?
My friend still misses his towbar, and his clutch, and his two front tyres, and his front driveshaft.
His wife was glad we 'decided' to leave the tree trunk in, she put some hanging baskets on it, looks nice too, Surfinia's i think they are, you know, the dark pink trailing ones.
Doh!

The moral here? Christ you need me to help you answer that?

[dansansome]

The moral here? Christ you need me to help you answer that?




XR2s are better built than Discoverys?

:confused:

[P0WERS160]

Had a 1988 XR2, some sod ran up the **** of it causing quite a dent, thought it would be a cracking idea to tie a chain around the rear towing eye and then wrap said chain around a 'stout' tree trunk, drive forward pulling dent out at the same time, easy.
My Dad still misses that tree, loved it he did.
Seems the old XR2 was built better than i thought.
Doh!

Remembering that, quite recently i thought it would be a good idea to 'help' a friend out who wanted a tree trunk taking out, he has a Discovery, i had a chain, what could go wrong?
My friend still misses his towbar, and his clutch, and his two front tyres, and his front driveshaft.
His wife was glad we 'decided' to leave the tree trunk in, she put some hanging baskets on it, looks nice too, Surfinia's i think they are, you know, the dark pink trailing ones.
Doh!

The moral here? Christ you need me to help you answer that?


Haha..always nice to have a twist in ye old tale! ...(aarrgh) :biglaugh:

[craig8661]

best one i have done was over 10 years ago just left colledge passed my test it was around 1997 was looking at this well blessed womman in the chest department not looking in front hadnt realised a traffic car had stopped on the rounderbout needless to say my escort was levelved to the winderscreen and two very unhappy coppers needless to say got banned for 6 months for driving without due care and attention

other one before licence was teaching a friend how to do a handbrake turn in a ford serara needless to say we parked it on the roof

other one a astra car derived van well bedford
was on a housing estate and there was a big lift of tarmac road about 10ft high on a very steap climb you could drive up it at about 15mph ok and go up the dirt track to the farm
well me being me and young and very foolish had a bet with a mate bet was hit it at speed and get the van to fly throu the air
so first attemp hit it at about 35mph it flew but mate didnt belive me
so revirsed down the road as far as i could hit it at 60mph about broke our backs and necks but i won the bet destryoed the van and cleared a farmers hedge and landed in the field we had ripped the sump of the car caved all the bottem of the van in and police still couldnt belive apart from sore backs and necks not one cut lucky i didnt get done for this one

[MalcQV]

Dukes of Hazzard eat your hearts out ^^^^^^^ :D

[Ben]

Dukes of Hazzard eat your hearts out ^^^^^^^ :D
i thought that too.

[Dudey Head]

Dukes of Hazzard eat your hearts out ^^^^^^^ :D

The General Lee never dropped apart on landing though. Made of tougher stuff that there vee-hickle!! (Like they didn't destroy several Dodge Chargers a week making that prog, sinful!)

:crying:

[buster]

I was replacing the master brake cylinder on my girlfroiends mini and was of the mind to listen to my radio, which was in my Rover 2000 TC. (Long time ago this)

So I pulled my Rover up close behind the mini and was happy listening to much mind numbing nonsense when I realised that we (Me and her brother) were not getting anywhere with the bleeding operation.

We suspected something amiss under the car so placing a set of ramps in front of the mini, I proceeded to drive it up them.

When I got to the top, I hit the foot brake to stop it rolling backwards.

Now the more mechanically minded if you probably know what happens next.

There are NO brakes as we are having problems bleeding them! so the mini hurtles back down the ramp and crashed into my ROVER!

Did I laugh?

No not really:Blush2:

[P0WERS160]

Don't know if this is a joke or genuine, made me laugh.

decide for yourselves.

This isn't me by the way.

http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm (http://www.audiforums.com/m_693578/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm)

cheers
Mark

Why do they keep saying the word "flame(d)"?? I've never heard that b4 in my life!!..

[sdk778]

My God, Is He An Australian By Chance?

[dansansome]

to flame is basically forum speak to "have a go at"

[P0WERS160]

to flame is basically forum speak to "have a go at"

Riiight... have guessed that.. :o

[audipersempre]

Many years ago my girlfriend had a left hand drive Honda Civic and I had a right hand drive Humber Sceptre.

In the end, driving both, I couldn't judge the width of either car. Went to park mine in front of hers one day and linked my rear bumper with her front bumper. Ripped them both off :o

[BILLYWHIZZ71]

i once jumped a humped back bridge in mk2 escort mexico ,left the floor got a good 6 feet off tramac and the steering rack snapped cleared a privit hedge n landed **** up in a ditch.:biglaugh:

[BILLYWHIZZ71]

i was changing a flat on my 72 camper i was on a bit of a slope leant the spare up against the open side door got in the passenger seat to get the jack knocked the handbrake off and sent the spare hurtling down the road ....it went straight accross a busy main road missed a bus 2 lorries bounced over a wall and smashed into a house lol..... the ocupants of the house were a bit supprised ..not sure wether by the wheel or by the:Blush2: greased stained prat jumping the wall for my wheel.

[Desertfish]

The General Lee never dropped apart on landing though. Made of tougher stuff that there vee-hickle!! (Like they didn't destroy several Dodge Chargers a week making that prog, sinful!)

:crying:

Last thing I remember reading while doing some research on this subject was that they totalled 3 Dodge Chargers per episode...:biglaugh:

[MalcQV]

Last thing I remember reading while doing some research on this subject was that they totalled 3 Dodge Chargers per episode...:biglaugh:

As my pal owns one (and even liked the Dukes of Hazzard when he was a kid), he hates the fact that so many were destroyed. Does have a good effect on the prices though.

[Ben]

As my pal owns one (and even liked the Dukes of Hazzard when he was a kid), he hates the fact that so many were destroyed. Does have a good effect on the prices though.
Nice chap is your pal.;)

[MalcQV]

Cheers I will pass that on ;)

[dandam]

Just spent a very enjoyable sunday morning laughing at your misfortune :biglaugh:

My tales thankfully are few (or at least not too dramatic), involving an XR2 and a posted that leapt out in front of me in a car park (it was even good enough to be bright yellow but insisted on twisting the chassis - who said they were well built....), a mk3 escort that could get a good 4 foot of air over a bridge near a friends house (the council decided to make it single track and put traffic lights on it afterwards, could never get enough speed after that), watching a back wheel bumping down the road in front of me whilst I was driving my first Golf GTi plus the petrol in the diesel tank, I think everyone (:o) get caughts with that

[dansansome]

someone once lent me an audi a6 to have a thrash around in. they also gave me some money to get some fuel in it.

i took it for a thrash around etc, then pulled up in the (very busy) petrol station. then proceeded to try, without success, to get the petrol flap open. i couldnt find an opener button, nor a point to press the flap to open it. :Blush2:

i then had to get back in the car and drive off, without the fuel.

very embarrassing :buttkick:

[Combover]

Several things spring to mind (sorry but I felt a duty to resurect this thread!)

First one was 11 years ago after passing my test. I jumped into my bright red E Reg escort in a pub car park. Stuck it in reverse and with a heavy right foot, went back at around 20-30mph, right into the car behind me, which was an old XR2 which had seen better days.

Inspecting the damage to my car, I'd smashed the rear light, and the drivers window (dont ask!!)

The XR2 was a state and being a law abiding kid, I left a note. Ten minutes later my dad had blasted to the pub to retrieve the note!

On the first date with my current missus, I had a bonus from work which was a Mk5 Golf GTi DSG in White with blue xenon headlights. Looked the business as it was from VW press office.

Anyway, showing off a little I decided that making a sharp right turn at 45mph was a good idea..........those nice 19inch alloys were left with a nice kerbing!

[brybrybry]

A couple of years ago when i was working at Daytona in Old Trafford I had done a race with 4 of my mates, on leaving its very hard to get out of go kart mode! Coming down what i think is called the park way (it now has traffic lights and is the back way into the trafford centre near john lewis) I slammed my brakes on and moved lanes to the left hand side, it didnt help the car was full of people it slopes slightly down hill and it was raining, well to cut the story short I smashed my dads citreon ax (horrible car) into the back of a brand new jaguar. Luckily the other driver wasnt too annoyed as he only had a slight dent in his bumper and it was a company car, on the other hand when I had to ring my dad to tell him there was no front end left on his AX he was a little bit annoyed!

Another crash this time in my punto, again in Trafford Park I was on ash burton road west which has a lovely long right hand bend (going away from TC) to say I took it a little bit on the fast side was a understatement. I ended up spinning the car round before my rear nearside alloy smashed into a pretty big curb spinnging the car and launching it in the air before sliding across the grass/soil into a chain link fence. Luckily i managed to drive away from that one with only a hugh chunk missing from the alloy wheel rim.

[Desertfish]

Erm... lets see... Years ago, when I was still living in Belgium, I saw this bird along the road who appeared to have a problem with her 2CV. So I pulled over to assist :naughty:. Turns out she got a flat but doesn't know how put a spare tire on. So I offer to do it for her. *** that I am, I'm putting the jack underneat the bodywork of the car rather that under the chassis. So there I am, jacking the car up and when the bodywork is about 2 feet in the air, the wheels are still firmly standing on the ground. I realise my mistake... Quickly lowered the car, jacked it up the proper way, changed the spare and put all the tools back in her 2CV. I never tried getting her number as was the original plan, but instead drove off with a red face...:o

Next one I can't take credit for. Some 25 years ago, an uncle of mine had a Cirtoen DS that was developing gearbox problems. As he's never affraid to try is hands on anything new, he decided that he would have a go at fixing the problem hinself. Stipped the gearbox out, dismateled it, coun't find anything wrong so decided to put it back together and drive the car to a garage instead. Only problem was, by the time he finished putting the gearbox back in, he had 1 gear to go forward and 4 in reverse.

Last one is not so much a stupidity on my part but a funny story never the less... When I moved to the UK, I was a little afraid of taking my car on the roads over here as I'd never driven around in a county where they drive on the other side of the road. Friends of mine told me there was nothing to be affraid of. "Just follow the car in front of you" they said "and you'll be OK". Guess who the fist person was to drive his car of the ferry in Dover...:o

[Dudey Head]

Next one I can't take credit for. Some 25 years ago, an uncle of mine had a Cirtoen DS that was developing gearbox problems. As he's never affraid to try is hands on anything new, he decided that he would have a go at fixing the problem hinself. Stipped the gearbox out, dismateled it, coun't find anything wrong so decided to put it back together and drive the car to a garage instead. Only problem was, by the time he finished putting the gearbox back in, he had 1 gear to go forward and 4 in reverse.

LOL :biglaugh:
That's brilliant! I bet he felt bloody stupid after that!
As the for fear of driving on the other side of the road, I sympathise! I've never done it, I know I'll forget & go round a roundabout the wrong way or something like that! I'd probably have to do it in an auto, it'd do my head in having to do right handed gear changes I think.

[Desertfish]

When I bought my first right hand drive car here in the UK, I had the door handle in my hands when I tried the change gear. That only happend once. Somehow, nowadays, it feels a lot more natural to me driving around in a right hand drive car. Probably becasue I'm left handed it's more natural to me to shift gears with my left hand. Having said that, jump from right hand to left hand drive car without a problem and drive both of them here in the UK as well as on the continent. It's like my friends said; you just follow the cars in front to you and after 5 minutes you got the hang of it. Easy peasy lemon-squeezy.

As for my uncle, he's actually quite proud of what he did especially because he hasn't come across anyone else ho managed to repeat that trick :biglaugh::biglaugh:

[Dudey Head]

As for my uncle, he's actually quite proud of what he did especially because he hasn't come across anyone else ho managed to repeat that trick :biglaugh::biglaugh:

Hee hee, and rightly so! :biglaugh:

[Dudey Head]

Probably becasue I'm left handed it's more natural to me to shift gears with my left hand.

I'm right handed so in theory it should be easier for me but I know it'd do my head in! I've been fiddling knobs with my left hand for over 13 years now. (lots &lots of innuendo intended!) :D

[MalcQV]

A couple of years ago when i was working at Daytona in Old Trafford I had done a race with 4 of my mates, on leaving its very hard to get out of go kart mode! Coming down what i think is called the park way (it now has traffic lights and is the back way into the trafford centre near john lewis) I slammed my brakes on and moved lanes to the left hand side, it didnt help the car was full of people it slopes slightly down hill and it was raining, well to cut the story short I smashed my dads citreon ax (horrible car) into the back of a brand new jaguar. Luckily the other driver wasnt too annoyed as he only had a slight dent in his bumper and it was a company car, on the other hand when I had to ring my dad to tell him there was no front end left on his AX he was a little bit annoyed!

Another crash this time in my punto, again in Trafford Park I was on ash burton road west which has a lovely long right hand bend (going away from TC) to say I took it a little bit on the fast side was a understatement. I ended up spinning the car round before my rear nearside alloy smashed into a pretty big curb spinnging the car and launching it in the air before sliding across the grass/soil into a chain link fence. Luckily i managed to drive away from that one with only a hugh chunk missing from the alloy wheel rim.

I will stay clear of Trafford Park then :p


Last one is not so much a stupidity on my part but a funny story never the less... When I moved to the UK, I was a little afraid of taking my car on the roads over here as I'd never driven around in a county where they drive on the other side of the road. Friends of mine told me there was nothing to be affraid of. "Just follow the car in front of you" they said "and you'll be OK". Guess who the fist person was to drive his car of the ferry in Dover...:o

Only ever driven a left hand drive with an automatic gearbox and only in the USA where driving really is a doddle. I find when I come back home I have the problem and usually you will find me driving on the right in car parks (watch out brybrybry at the Trafford Centre :p).

We went to California in April and for the first time went around a Rotary (American for roundabout), going anti-clockwise (as one should in the USA) on one is strange but it appeared the Americans thought so too as there did not seem to be any particular lane they stayed in :D

[hongkongstuey]

one stupid thing my mate did is spend 5 years restoring a 1974 citroen ds 23, only for his dad telling him upon getting it back on the road, that it had been involved in a bank job :aargh4: and had been in the back garden ever since.

one thing i did, put some stupidly wide tyres on my escort 1300L when i was about 18, then proceeded to show how good the tyres were by driving round and round and round a medium sized roundabout till i was defying the laws of physics with my brothers face glued to the passenger window and him screaming at me to stop, of course i wasnt going to till the tyres broke loose, before that happened, my brother was sick all up the window and over my freshly fitted xr3i seats and door cards :aargh4:

got millions more stories

[Dudey Head]

got millions more stories

Do tell... :D

[Desertfish]

one stupid thing my mate did is spend 5 years restoring a 1974 citroen ds 23, only for his dad telling him upon getting it back on the road, that it had been involved in a bank job :aargh4: and had been in the back garden ever since.


What wonders me though is how his dad knew the car had been involved in a bankjob...!

[Dudey Head]

What wonders me though is how his dad knew the car had been involved in a bankjob...!

Yeah, I did wonder!
Hongkongstuey, is your dad Ronnie Biggs?! :p

[hagis]

Yeah, I did wonder!
Hongkongstuey, is your dad Ronnie Biggs?! :p

It wasn't Hongkingstuey's dad, it was his "mate's" dad ;)

[Dudey Head]

It wasn't Hongkingstuey's dad, it was his "mate's" dad ;)

Ahh, right. That's only aiding & abetting then... :D

[hagis]

This happened to one of the lads I work with:
He's got an old Escort that has a series of problems with the electrics. This culminated in him losing engine power and all the lights coming on his dashboard as he went round a roundabout on Sunday. He couldn't start the car at all and on glancing up saw a bloke standing at a bus stop.
"Any chance you could give me a push please mate?"
The bloke ignored him. My friend turned round to ask him again and noticed that the bloke at the bus stop had a white stick that he'd managed not to see!

[Ben]

Got my courtosey car today, as promised they had located a TFSI engined car for me, they told me that things yesterday haddn't gone according to plan as someone bought it:(. It was the 170 as well. any way, you can't blame them if someone is willing to hand over the reddies.

so the sales guy comes over and says they have an alternative but its not the tfsi engine, ok, not to worry, i reply, he continues but then Tony the technicion appears and my attention switches.

So i'm driving home in the Golf + :crying: (sorry, i don't like it) and i'm thinking, this isn't too bad for a 1.4 petrol as i'm doing 85 up the A46, it pulls quite well, i notice that the revs are no more than 3k and i think that this is very similar rev range vs speed that i get out of my car, i then think that a petrol should be revving higher, as the red line on this + begins at about 4400.

Anyway, in to cov and unsuprisingly the fuel light comes on so i pop to the local garage for a £5ers worth, pull up to the pump and bugger, out of service, so i shuffle the car over to the next pump, i recall thinking that i'll always ask for a petrol car as its a cheaper per litre splash and dash.

put the nozzle in the car and begin, and click, suqeeze again and click, great i think, i've landed on the most sensitive pump, its going to take ages to stick £5 worth in here, squeeze and click, then................







..............i notice the word DIESEL on the filler cap and on the rear of the filler flap. i look at the display and phew 66 pence, i replace the nozzle and walk to the shop, stick my head round the door and say, remember that 66 pence;) walk back to the car and put in £5 of diesel, go and pay £5.66.

driving the half mile home i thought

phew that was close.
I'll enter that in the appropriate forum thread.

I took my car to listers stratford and had the pleasure of a diesel + for the 30+ miles home to cov, the whole journey i thought i was in a petrol.

[hagis]

They should put the type of fuel the hire car uses on the filler cap to stop that happening.


Oh wait a second....


:D

[MalcQV]

When I first bought mine, I had to keep checking the badge, it sounded so diesel like after my v.quiet Accord. Easy done

[Smutts]

Scotland, Eaglesham Moor, winter, snowed and gale force blizzards in the night, unbeknown to me, the gale had blown over the temporary fencing of an enormous hole in the site car park, and covered over the fencing and filled the hole to the brim with snow. Guess where I parked the car on my first day at work?:p
Not often you see a car looking like a submarine in Das Boot.:1zhelp:

[Dudey Head]

Scotland, Eaglesham Moor, winter, snowed and gale force blizzards in the night, unbeknown to me, the gale had blown over the temporary fencing of an enormous hole in the site car park, and covered over the fencing and filled the hole to the brim with snow. Guess where I parked the car on my first day at work?:p
Not often you see a car looking like a submarine in Das Boot.:1zhelp:


:biglaugh: Did you get a photo?

[Desertfish]

Scotland, Eaglesham Moor, winter, snowed and gale force blizzards in the night, unbeknown to me, the gale had blown over the temporary fencing of an enormous hole in the site car park, and covered over the fencing and filled the hole to the brim with snow. Guess where I parked the car on my first day at work?:p
Not often you see a car looking like a submarine in Das Boot.:1zhelp:

"Smutts Snowmobile"... Sounds wicked... :D

[audipersempre]

Forgot to tighten one set of wheel nuts on my brothers car after changing the rear brake pads.

Some time later he was driving the car, there was a clunk and his wheel passed him on it's way down the road!

What are brothers for :D

[Dudey Head]

Forgot to tighten one set of wheel nuts on my brothers car after changing the rear brake pads.

Some time later he was driving the car, there was a clunk and his wheel passed him on it's way down the road!

What are brothers for :D

:eek: :scared: :yikes:

[MalcQV]

Forgot to tighten one set of wheel nuts on my brothers car after changing the rear brake pads.

Some time later he was driving the car, there was a clunk and his wheel passed him on it's way down the road!

What are brothers for :D

I did that to my M-I-Law and it was a genuine mistake honest :o. She complained about a knocking noise and I tightened the nuts before it fell off :p

[dansansome]

at least this

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=1sIzcZ5tJJU


didnt happen :)

...well not quite

[MalcQV]

at least this

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=1sIzcZ5tJJU


didnt happen :)

...well not quite

:eek::bigeyes::yikes:

[BDT]

I do have a few funny tales to tell, some that i did, and a few my mates have done.

1/ When i was about 16, one of my old school mates had his dads brand new xr3i convertible. so picture the scene, its the middle of summer, the top is down, the tunes are loud, and we are checking out everything in a skirt, when we spot two young ladies sporting bikini tops and tight jean shorts, and I'm trying to grab her attention, when .......Bang!!!!!

my mate runs into the parked car in front of him. :Blush2:


2/ Whist driving to work first thing in the morning in my Mk3 Cav Sri on the M62, i get a small wobble in the steering at around 90 mph, so being in the fast lane, I decide to make my way to the hard shoulder, and before i can get from the middle to the hard shoulder, the N/S/F wheel flys off, bounces in between two cars, and smashes the farmers fence next to the hard shoulder and disappears into the field.

The apprentice in the passenger seat grabs my arm and say's "stay cool" whilst using the kind of grip last seen by Steve Martin in "planes trains and automobiles" when he grabs the dash!

When we ground to a halt on the hard shoulder, the front disc was a half moon shape!

(turns out the night before someone had tried to steal the wheels and was defeated by the locking wheel nuts, however they failed to refit the ones they took off - the one on the back was the same!)

My mate collected the wheel from the feild, and after the AA picked me up and took me home i fixed the car on the drive, and was up and running again by 1pm ;)

3/ whilst working on the rear of my MK 1 escort, and having removed the rear axle and suspension, i had forgotten i had tied my rottweiler to the rear spring hanger, to stop him wandering off,( i always did that, he used to lay in the shade and just watch me work) when a cat appeared, and the dog made a run for the cat dragging the escorts off its stand and about 8 foot from where it was originally (just glad i wasn't under it) :Blush2:

4/ 20 years ago :Blush2: you used to be able to drive all the way along southport beach, and many a summer day was spent arseing around with my friends with one of my mk 1's or mk2's.

Anyway, one day we found a large hump in the sand, that i hit at speed which caused the car to fly up, so thinking i was some sort of stunt driver I started trying to get the car on to two wheels. after many attempts, i managed it, if only for about 10 yards before plonking it back on its wheels.

later that day when we had all bailed out and were sitting on the beach, one of my mates decides he wants to try, jumps in and spins off, hits the hump about 45 and barrel rolls the mk2 onto its roof :zx11:

Looking back it was hilarious, but at the time, all i could see was the broken screen, and a huge dent in the roof - But we kicked the glass out, after rolling it the right way up, and drove home - pushed most of the dent with my feet the next day - try that with a moderen car and see if it will start after wards - not bloody likely lol

[paul b]

I found story 1 and 3 hilarious... :D

Have some rep... :beerchug:

Paul

[Col]

Hire cars are good !

Last week on holiday (Me, the Mrs, the two kids and my Mum visiting my brother)....

"We" that is "Me and Brother" thought it would be a good idea to drive our Opal Zaffira hire car 6000ft up a mountain pass on the French / Italian border up to an abandoned hill fort.

Things were going well until the track got so rutted that we all had to turf out + brothers dog to get some better ground clearance, leaving my brother driving.

Erm, to say the least, "We" got moaned at. "We" thought it was very funny indeed and the kids loved it !

Eagle eyed viewers will notice said car parked up in the distance along with a 4x4 that had nothing to do with us. "Our" view was that it wasn't a proper 4x4 and if they were having a go, so should we..... and we did ! ..... I say "our" view, I mean me and brother.

If all that wasn't stupid enough, my brother who lives near there has a perfectly good Land Rover which obviously would have had no troubles at all. Where would the fun have been though? Hire cars in extreme places are / is much more fun.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v602/colin__/P7310064.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v602/colin__/P7310073.jpg

[Dudey Head]

Extreme Car Hire! It's gotta be the latest 'reality' TV show!

[Hex69]

A few years ago on Crete, we had a Twingo hire car, and would go to a different beach each day. we saw one on the map that looked in a great spot, and had the necessary Taverna, etc. Decided to go there, on the way to the beach you had to go over the mountains and back down again, came round a corner and the tarmac ran out changed to gravel. Great I thought, some rallying in order here:biglaugh:, round next corner though came across freshed laid gravel and then a grader in the (single-track) road coming towards us:aargh4:http://www.vipalaska.com/vippropmgmt/images/Grader.jpg

Had too edge to the side with 1000ft drop on the passenger side, my OH was not amused, then came the roller, again had to get in.

However, once we got on the freshly surfaced stuff, great driving, though I got earache for the rest of the hols........

[Jimbo_S3]

The day I passed my driving test, (first time aged 17) I nagged my mum to let me have the family ford escort 1.3L to go to college. She agreed. After college, 3 mates asked for a lift home. We went via a network of single track lanes and I felt like Carlos Sainz. Driving like a complete *****, I met a police car coming the other way. I braked hard and came to a screaming halt 2 ft from the bonnet of the panda car. Then the tyre smoke passed us. The PC in the passenger seat asked me to take a seat in the back of their car. I tried to explain, but when I mentioned that I'd passed my test that morning they couldn't quite believe it. They gave me a producer and told me to take it home and show my Dad :zx11:. He beat me and I didn't get the car for another month.

Two months later, my dad gave me the car to start my new job. It lasted three weeks until I spun on a wet greasy morning and hit a wall. It was a complete write-off and I even managed to bend the roof! It was an awful car anyway.:biglaugh:

[Jimbo_S3]

Another funny.................When I was 19, my cousin invited me to a fancy dress party as a housewarming for their new place. My sister picked me out a chicken costume as I was in work. I returned home late from work, missing the start of the party so I quickly changed and got behind the wheel of my car for the 3 mile drive down the A48 to my cousin. I might add at this point, I did not have the chicken - head part of the costume on. All was going well until a copper stood in the middle of the road with his hand up. He had a radar gun in the other hand. When he approached the car, he burst out laughing and got his mate out of the patrol car. They let me off doing 78mph in a 60 limit but they made me do the birdie dance for a van full of their collegues. :mad:

[BDT]

They let me off doing 78mph in a 60 limit but they made me do the birdie dance for a van full of their collegues. :mad:

:beerchug: PMSL!

Now that would have been great on you tube :)

[Jimbo_S3]

Thankfully it was in the days when the internet was in it's infancy and Youtube hadn't been thought of.:D

[MalcQV]

...the costume on. All was going well until a copper stood in the middle of the road with his hand up. He had a radar gun in the other hand. When he approached the car, he burst out laughing and got his mate out of the patrol car. They let me off doing 78mph in a 60 limit but they made me do the birdie dance for a van full of their collegues. :mad:

Laugh I cried, fantastic I would of done the same to get off 3 points :biggthump

[Jimbo_S3]

Thankfully, I have remained free of points for the last 4 years and fully intend to stay that way. I am hugely ashamed to admit that I have appeared in court on three separate occasions for totting up and over the years amassed around 39 points and a two-week ban. I drive for a living and do around 4k on average per month. I would strongly recommend that no assignment is worth losing your licence over and if anyone is faced with court..........................get a good solicitor. I did and avoided the mandatory ban every time.
As far as meeting the good old fashioned traffic cop on the road, if you're sat in the back of his car and he has his book open, CRY. I'm man enough to admit that I have done, some of these officers are human after all.

Go forth, drive quickly but choose your moments wisely.:D

[paulthefox]

many years ago while in my youth used to do stupid thing in my first car an old banger of a ford corsair (with column change):biglaugh: any way while returning home from said pub all tanked up .manage tto hit the kerb and spin the car 3 times and end up in the local canal

needless to say the car was soaked and ended up goin to the scpappers he offered £50 so took him up on the offer;)


paul

[Combover]

I took my dad to Manchester airport about ten years ago in his Ford Scorpio Estate. Huge hulk of a thing it was. 2.7 Automatic.

Anyway, he hadnt emptied the boot so it was heavy in the *** so to speak. Dropped my dad off at departures, tank it to the round about, feel the back end sliding and spin it on the damp roundabout. It was 6am ish so quiet.

I was then faced with my friends dad in his Range Rover coming towards me. At this point I should mention his dad is a Policeman at the airport and the Range Rover had big blue lights on the top! I was lucky that day!

[a5tra5]

Bought a D Reg Escort XR3i as my first car, well it was 2 cars in one.
Thankfully went walkies.

Mark.

[trooper30]

I had an escort years ago, greased up the rear hubs, tightened them as much as I could and didnt put the split pibn back in. Driving down the road, sheared the wheel off, only realised when the wheel passed me when i braked!:Blush2:

[justask4rodders]

When i got my first nifty fifty my dad was showing me how to use the throttle and the gears but forgot to tell me that i had to pull on the clutch as well as brake in order to stop. so i ended up riding str aight into the closed gate!!!!!!


I blew up my old corrado 2l 16v by only running it in for 100 miles after an engine re build, then seeing how fast it would go it was quick for about 60 seconds, then a con rod snapped and destroyed the block!!!